Always a Kid

Posted on January 20, 2015 by enthusiasmiscontagious

It was my first trip back home to my parents farmhouse in quite some time. Living in the Northeast Kingdom of Vermont thirty miles from the Canadian line, it seems my parents endure the kind of winters only polar bears would find tolerable. I affectionately call it the most wonderful place to be from. As I shivered in my bed in their upstairs bedroom I was fully dressed wearing my hoodie. As I lay awake I surmised I could probably eat a full ear of corn in 10 seconds with as fast as my teeth were chattering. I couldn’t believe I had ever liked snow and cold. The exterior of my parent’s house looked like a crystal cave replete with rows of stalactite icicles. The snow two feet deep crunched under foot as I loaded up the sled to bring in all my luggage from the car. I used a plastic sled so I could make it all in one trip. Only a penguin would welcome a return visit into these elements for a second load.

Those of us who now reside in the south may never know the “joys” Vermonters experience this time of year. Back home in Tennessee if we get a hint of frost on the grass; schools close, bread and milk vanish off store shelves faster than a cheese pizza at a Weight Watchers Convention, and fist fights break out over the last birth control products. Yet here I stood in single degree temperatures with a stiff northern wind and blowing snow and it was dark yet peaceful. Since I was staying but one night, I chose to leave the car running all night. I feared the expected -20 below temperatures, might keep me there till the 4th of July if the car never started. I couldn’t risk it. The eighth of a tank of gasoline I would use overnight was well worth the peace of mind. As I drove the frigid snow covered tundra the following morning I did it with a smile; my backside benefited from the long idle, it was toasty warm.

If you’ve never traveled with parents later in life, you have to do it at least twice. Once for the reality check and the second time to view what your own future holds. I did have moments where I reverted back to my own childhood. It’s not often at 53 years of age where you visit an establishment and the restaurant proclaims “kids eat free” and you get too! Driving the 2600 mile roundtrip twice picking them up and bringing them home, fostered humorous stories from my childhood. I was reminded vividly of the time I streaked through the large back yard sans clothes, or when I flushed four pickles down the toilet at the same time and flooded the bathroom, or when I slathered my twin and me with diaper ointment when we were two creating a bathing nightmare. We shared stories of living on our first farm in Maine and the surprise I got when I hugged my favorite horse goodbye; he bit my ear. I learned I didn’t miss him much after that. A lesson I still draw upon when people hurt me in life.

As our vehicle passed through Albany, NY, Hershey, PA, Pigeon Forge, TN, and a host of other towns, our nostalgic journey took us through inspirational venues like; Yankee Candle, Marshall’s, Goodwill, Dirt Cheap (yes there is a southern store chain by that name). At each stop the car interior got smaller. Our waistlines and bargain finds fought continually for every inch of available space. In one store my mother hit the jackpot when she purchased a 25 pound bag of road salt for only two dollars. That would last two winters in Tennessee, but only two days in Vermont.

As quick as the two week getaway started, it was over. I delivered them back just the way I left them. Blowing snow with single digit temperatures. Despite my father’s continual question of “Are we there yet?” Our role reversal left me undaunted, I’d do it again. One thing you learn after your 50th birthday is there may not be many more nostalgic trips one can take with parents. With a lump in my throat I drove the long journey home. I stopped at the top of their mountain to see the stunning winter sunrise one last time.

I am now at home, and this morning I looked in the mirror. I saw what I always see, plenty of gray in my hair. But you know it didn’t bother me as much as usual. I gained valuable wisdom on my trip. I learned all’s well as long as my parents are with me. Because as long as they live, it doesn’t matter what I look like, I’m still a kid.

Posted in My Thoughts on Today | Tagged | 3 Comments

Rethinking Commitment

Posted on January 12, 2015 by enthusiasmiscontagious

The story is told of a barnyard discussion between a chicken and a pig. Morale had been running a bit low on the farm and they were discussing ways they could refocus the farm animals into a better outlook on life. The chicken who was always coming up with outlandish ideas said to his friend the pig, “Hey, lets have a special breakfast and invite all the animals. I’ll supply the eggs, you provide the bacon.” The pig immediately didn’t like the idea and stated, ” Wait a minute, I have a big problem with your suggestion, it’s not fair!” The chicken said, “What do you mean?” The pig said incredulously, “For the breakfast, you only have to make a sacrifice, but I have to make a commitment!”

It seems almost impossible to get anyone willing to commit to anything nowadays. Look at civic organizations, church attendance, and volunteer projects, hardly a soul ever shows up to help. So imagine my surprise this week when I read what a charismatic religious leader in India got his men followers to do. I am sure like me you have heard a particular sermon that inspired you. Maybe one even prompted you to alter the course of your life and make changes.

Did this inspiring leader get his followers to plant a forest of trees to help the environment? Or build a clinic for the poor? Maybe feed 10,000 homeless persons? No! He must have a boatload of charisma because his followers heard his message and changed their life irreversibly. I have been inspired by many a sermon, but never have I heard a religious leader preach that in order to meet God, you have to get castrated. On his website, the religious leader named Rahim is touted as being a saint, author, inventor, philosopher, philanthropist, peace activist and ‘the ultimate humanitarian’. Of course he has a boatload of new problems. He’s being investigated for sexual misconduct. I suppose it has nothing to do with the now four hundred angry significant others.

Meanwhile in another bizarre case in India, devotees of a dead guru are actually fighting a court battle in Punjab state to preserve their leader’s body in a freezer. In court filings they insist he is only meditating. I’m glad they aren’t Catholic, wouldn’t that be classified as a Pope Sicle? I believe their devotion however will ultimately garner a cool reception with the judge.

At the last two church work projects I oversaw, out of a church of 184 members, I garnered three volunteers. Three volunteers! That represents roughly .016 of the whole church. Yet Rahim got 400 men to stand in line like they were waiting for an errant bus to give their “all” and I mean all! And they did. I must be a pretty good pastor, I’ve NEVER asked my church men to sacrifice that much. Yet as I evaluate this guy, I can’t help but think his website missed a title in describing him. Back in the state of Maine where I grew up, we’d all be in agreement by saying; he must be one wicked good salesman.

Posted in My Thoughts on Today | Tagged | Leave a comment

Baby, It’s Cold Outside

Posted on January 9, 2015 by enthusiasmiscontagious

87% of the United States is below freezing. It’s so cold, politicians are keeping their hands in their own pockets this morning. Whether you are or you’re not a global warming theorist, you can’t deny it’s a harder sell on days like this.
To my friends in the north, I offer this bit of good news, Spring is only 13 weeks away. Unless you are in either Minnesota or Vermont, then you can add another six weeks and two cords of wood to that total.

When I went to college in my 1971 Ford, it was dependable for only one thing. For some inexplicable reason, when the temperature dropped below freezing, an obscure wire would ground under the hood. Unless I would unplug the horn, the blasted horn (no pun intended) would blow continuously.

Since I needed the horn to drive in Boston traffic, I would have to follow the weather forecast diligently. My errant system was foolproof until one night the weatherman was off by 3 degrees. A dorm lynch mob greeted me at 1 am with the urgent message that if I didn’t stop the noise, they would with clubs. I ran straight for my car in my tighty whiteys. For the remaining semester, I left the horn unplugged, I couldn’t trust the New England weather.

I recall the story of an angry television viewer that wrote a stinging letter to the station weatherman. In his letter he wrote with extreme sarcasm, “I want to thank you for the exercise program you created for me, I spent four hours shoveling six inches of your partly cloudy out of my driveway today.”

As difficult as my job is, imagine being the guy who has to forecast the perfect weather for weddings, picnics, and church gatherings. No thank you, I’ll just stick to my mild complaining. I’m familiar with the country song entitled, “It’s five o’clock somewhere”, but how about another one entitled, “It’s 80 degrees somewhere?”

I’d stay and write more but I’m looking for an ice pick. I have to chop the dog loose from the fire hydrant, it might take a awhile. Baby, it’s cold outside.

Posted in My Thoughts on Today | Tagged | Leave a comment

Son, Don’t Forget!

Posted on January 5, 2015 by enthusiasmiscontagious

“Don’t forget!” My father yelled those words to my six year old twin brother and me as we darted down the path to swim in a mountain river aptly named, the Swift River. It was not often we got to visit the Kancamagus Highway in Northern NH near my grandparents home. The 27 mile scenic highway offered breathtaking views of the river and the White Mountains. My father’s pointed advice was, “Do not go near the edge until I get there.” My brother not paying attention ran ahead dipped his foot in the water only to slip on the rock he was standing on and fell into the swift current. Seeing my terrified brother bobbing up and down heading downstream screaming, our father jumped in and rescued him. Now standing safely back on the river bank with a towel draped around my wayward brother, he sternly looked at us and said, “I thought I told you not to forget?”

Have you ever stopped to think how many times parents especially dad’s use the words, don’t forget? When you cross the street, don’t forget to look both ways. He spoke those words to me countless times. When I was a child he’d say, “Don’t forget, tomorrow is your Mother’s birthday, she’d love a homemade card.” When he told my brother and me “don’t forget” to finish your chores before you go out and play. We did forget. My fanny never forgot the result.

When I graduated high school he presented me with the keys to a blue 1971 Ford Maverick with this advice, “Don’t forget to change the oil every three thousand miles, it will give you good service.” When you get to your destination, don’t forget to let us know you made it safely. Late for an appointment one day and leaving me alone with my fiancé in his house, he took two steps, turned around and said, “Don’t forget, you can’t play house until you own one!” That was my Dad, straight to the point. When we bought our first house after we were married, I was quick to call him and tell him we were going to play house, a lot. He laughed.

On my wedding day as he prepared to marry me and my bride, he offered this admonition in his wedding homily, “Don’t forget, throughout your marriage NEVER ask yourself have I married the right partner? Rather ask yourself am I BEING the right partner.” Some years later on Valentine’s Day in a quick phone call I told him I was rushing my wife to the hospital to give birth to their second grandchild. As I was rushing off his parting words were, “don’t forget, have a little girl for me.” We didn’t disappoint him, we did have “his girl”. The last time we were together as we were saying our good byes, he told me, “don’t forget, I love you supremely.”

It was these flood of memories that washed over me as I drove to their home in northern Vermont this week. My father will be 80 this month. After a lifetime of service as a pastor and teacher I am losing him. Not right away, just a little bit everyday. His mind once arrayed in full splendor of wit, counsel and brilliance, has diminished like the falling of autumn leaves. His decline has added urgency to spending quality time with him before he no longer remembers me.

When I arrived, I ran into the farmhouse like I’d done a hundred times, I quickly hugged my father and mother then darted back out to the car to get my suitcase. It was then I heard my father say to my mother, “who was that?” The day I knew would one day come has now arrived.

Dad, all those years you thought I wasn’t listening and I’d forget, you were wrong. It matters not that you have forgotten, what matters is I haven’t. I love you supremely Dad and that’s something I’ll NEVER forget!

Posted in My Thoughts on Today | Tagged | 7 Comments